Tuesday 15 July 2014

164. Bagel From Hell

3rd July 2014, Beigl Bake, Brick Lane, London

Beigl Bake is a Shoreditch institution to be counted on. Quite literally - it's open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. Apart from the two days in May 2014 when the family members owning it apparently hated each other briefly and closed the place.

I doubt anyone just visiting London or Shoreditch would spot the place if it wasn't for the queue - it's a very plain looking hole in a Brick Lane wall. Still, there are so many things I love about this place; the misspelled sign that's been there for the past 40 years, the over the top cakes available next to the most delicious bagels I've ever eaten and even the borderline aggressive staff that are seemingly also there 24/7.

Now, it is obviously not the first time I'm in there. In fact, I blame the place for at least half of my Brick Lane pounds added on over the last year. Their bacon and cream cheese bagel is irresistible when staggering home at 3 AM. However, the bagel to have according to all other bagel lovers in London including Time Out and London Standard, is the salt beef bagel. So I decided to trust these other bagel lovers.

Now, for you so called bagel lovers... Why the effing hell do you put this in your mouths and keep it there?!?! And why do you trick other people into doing the same??? Why???

I started to change my mind about ticking this off The List the minute I had made my order and the angry lady  at the counter starting to cut slabs of meat up. Meat hanging in the window. Meat looking the exact opposite from a nice steak at Hawksmoor. Don't get me wrong - even as an active non vegetarian I'm fully aware that meat is probably not from animals having gone happily in there sleep - but never have I had meat that looked so... Dead.

So I decided to do the mature thing and close my eyes, ignore the smell and just take a huge bite out of this supposed delicacy... I don't mean this in any sort of Freudian way, but it is by far the worst thing I have ever put in my mouth. And I have to ask again, why do people put this in their mouth voluntarily and then raves about it??? Are they masochists who wants the rest of us to suffer too? I. Do. No. Get. It.

So, to all my friends who have insisted that a salt beef bagel is the only bagel to go for - thank you for ruining 3 AM bagels for me forever!

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