500 Things to do in the 500 Days until the Big 3-0: 123. Some Very Exotic Islands

30th April 2013, Archipelago, Fitzrovia, London

I'm lucky to have friends who enjoys new and weird experiences as much as I do.

Me and my friend Scotty (not the goose) were off to dine at Archipelago, determined to try anything on the menu crazy enough for us to have never tried it before. And that says a lot seeing as in my country we eat Rudolph and in Scotty's country they eat Skippy.

Arriving at Archipelago I instantly adored it! I needed a password to get to my table and I got to eat my dinner sitting on a throne (Scotty got a regular chair) next to a peacock. Granted, a dead peacock - but never the less, a peacock.

Before I even had a chance to get excited about the menu, the lovely and Being asked to put the pill in the potpourri bowl in front of me was even more odd. Next thing we know, the mint pill has turned itself into a hot towel. This first oddity of many set the tone for the rest of the evening and that made me look forward for all to come.

Wine: Massaya Classic Red. Lebanese. Yummy. Who knew they grew something other than mezze platters?

Starters: Burmese Embrace and Serengeti Strut. Python carpaccio and Zebra jerky. One was delicious, the other disgusting. Guess which one I picked?

To be fair, the waiter did warn me that python snake is not to everyone's taste. And I shortly got what he was talking about. Very chewy, very funky. Needless to say I did not enjoy it.

Lucky for me, Scotty's parents' clearly taught him how to share. Thank you Scotty's Mum. Thank you Scotty's Dad.

Zebra is delicious as it turns out.

Main: Pontiac Rodeo and Peruvian Jumper. Bison and Alpaca. My new favourite non-cows.

I honestly don't know which was yummier. And yes, I do eat from other people's plates. Bison is like a proper good steak worthy of a man's man, or a Viking girl whilst Alpaca is an amazingly tender piece of meat worthy of kings.

So far, so good.

Dessert: Ottoman Bake and Pharao's Treasure. And a baby bee!

I soon as I saw the baby bee on the menu, I knew I needed to have it. Sadly, the brown butter ice cream on the side of the baby bee did not intrigue me. Lucky for me, bit of a trembling lip action scored me a baby bee and the dessert I actually wanted.

This time, I actually left Scotty's dessert alone after he made it clear I was not allowed to eat the 24 carat gold on his plate.

Instead I focused on my honey covered baby bee. It was surprisingly crunchy. And surprisingly tasteless.

I ate a bee! I ate a bee, on purpose!

Digestif: A Visit From The Doctor. Exactly as absurd as it sounds.

For starters. They gave us more pills. Multi coloured ones this time around. Blue one for me, yellow for Scotty. After popping the pills into a bowl of water, the doctor came.

With an actual doctor's bag. And a statoscope. I was intrigued to say the least.

In the bag the doctor held some of the most random yet amazing concoctions I could ever have imagined. We're talking gold flake schnapps, snake infused absinthe and 10 other types of fabulous booziness!

Narrowing it down to three we enjoyed some way too large shots and after this, I suspected that crawling would be my mean of transport home.

And to end the craziness, the blue and yellow pills had now turned into a bison and a lion.

I'm the bison!

I want to hang out here all the time.